Suicide, Christians and the Church: A Reflection

I can remember driving down the highway in Virginia in a state of depression. I’ve slipped into depression – probably a milder form than many have experienced – two or three times in my life. One was during my first pastorate, back in the late 80s. Every Saturday I’d get a copy of the Richmond newspaper and peruse the help wanted ads to see if there was a way for me to provide for my family if I threw in the towel on ministry. Honestly, if I’d had a fall-back option then I’d probably not be in the ministry today. As I drove down the rural highway in Southside Virginia my mind was walking through the valley of deep darkness that David spoke of in Psalm 23.

I looked at trees in the median and thought I could just swerve the wheel into one of those and the pain would stop.

I never seriously considered turning the wheel, but I had a deep longing for death that was evidence of the hopelessness and despair in my heart.   Continue at Dave Miller

Does Struggling with Pornography Disqualify a Pastor from Ministry?

It seemed like just another picture perfect fall day. My grandfather called my teenage cousin and me to go with him for a ride. We loved to spend time with him—especially on road trips. As it turned out, this would be a very different kind of trip. Coughing all along the way, he drove straight to the hospital. While my cousin and I waited for hours, my grandfather was admitted. That was our final road trip. My grandfather died after a brief stay in the hospital.

 

I loved my grandfather. It ached my heart to think: what if he had gone in sooner? Would his doctors have discovered the cancer in time? But men don’t like to go the doctor, do they? We don’t like to admit that we have problems, and we certainly hate confessing that we need help. But acquiescing to the fear of vulnerability and to our culture’s false standard of masculinity (i.e., “I’m a man, I can handle it”) often makes for tragic endings. There’s a lesson in this for all pastors. Living by the motto, “I don’t need help, and I can’t expose my vulnerabilities,” can lead to ministerial death, even when Christ offers abundantly abounding grace to rescue us.

In his classic essay on the dangers of ministry, “The Almost Inevitable Ruin of Every Minister,” Donald Whitney writes that:   Continue at Bobby Scott

The Primary Reason I’m a Preacher — John MacArthur

“Therefore, putting aside all malice and all deceit and hypocrisy and envy and all slander, like newborn babies, long for the pure milk of the word, so that by it you may grow in respect to salvation, if you have tasted the kindness of the Lord.” — 1 Peter 2:1-3

While preaching on the verses above, in a sort of aside, John MacArthur stated his primary reason for being in the ministry. I personally believe it is also the primary reason the Lord has blessed his ministry:

If Peter was going to exhort his congregation through this letter, he could have chosen a number of approaches to this. He could have said to them, “You need to read the Word.” That’s what Paul said in 1 Timothy 4:13. He could have said, “You need to study the Word so that you’re not ashamed, rightly dividing it,” as Paul said in 1 Timothy 2:15. He could have said what the psalmist said in Psalm 19:14 what Joshua 1:8 says, what Paul said in Philippians 4:8, he could have said, “Think on the Word, meditate on the Word.” He could have said what Paul said in 1 Timothy 4:11, “Teach the Word.” He could have said what Paul said in 2 Timothy 4:2, “Preach the Word.” He could have said what it says in Acts 17:11 about the Bereans, “Search the Word.” He could have said what is instructed to us in the armor of the Christian in Ephesians 6, “Take the sword of the Spirit which is the Word of God,” or wield the Word, but he didn’t. I suppose he could have said what is in Psalm 119:11, “Hide the Word.” Put it in your heart. All of those things are certainly critical.    Continue at Eric T. Young

Biblical Theology and Shepherding

How would you write a pastor’s job description? Where would you look for models? Maybe you’d ask a few other local churches for theirs and make a few tweaks to reflect your own church’s schedule and programs.

That assumes, of course, that everyone already knows what a pastor is supposed to be and do. But how do we know what a pastor’s fundamental role is?

Certainly we should look to Scripture to tell us what a pastor is. But where in Scripture? We could start with the work implied in elders’ qualifications (1 Tim. 3:1–7; Tit. 1:5–10), and carefully consider explicit commands given to church leaders. When we scratch beneath the surface of some of those commands, though, an interesting picture emerges. Consider Acts 20:28 and 1 Peter 5:1–3, both addressed to elders of local churches:

Pay careful attention to yourselves and to all the flock, in which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers, to care for [Gk. poimainein] the church of God, which he obtained with his own blood. (Acts 20:28)

So I exhort the elders among you, as a fellow elder and a witness of the sufferings of Christ, as well as a partaker in the glory that is going to be revealed: shepherd [Gk. poimanate] the flock of God that is among you, exercising oversight, not under compulsion, but willingly, as God would have you; not for shameful gain, but eagerly; not domineering over those in your charge, but being examples to the flock. (1 Pet. 5:1–3)   Continue at Bobby Jamieson

10 Questions with Barnabas Piper on His New Book “The Pastor’s Kid”

Today Barnabas Piper’s book The Pastor’s Kid: Finding Your Own Faith and Identity is being released. Being the son of John Piper (who wrote the forward), he draws on his own experience of growing up as a PK. Pastors who want to raise their kids as best as they can will benefit immensely. Barnabas provides several quotes from many other PKs, too, representing a broader perspective on being raised in a minister’s family than just his own.

I was greatly helped by The Pastor’s Kid. Barnabas addresses many dynamics of the PK’s experience that I never could have seen coming. I recommend it not only to pastors, but also to their wives (Mrs. McKiddie swiped my pre-release copy, and she’s already a third of the way through it).  Curious to find out more, I threw a few questions his way about what it’s like being a pastor’s kid.   Continue at Pastoralized

Seven Ways to Hurt Your Pastor

If you really want to hurt your pastor, then this blogpost is for you.

 

This past week alone, I had conversations with dozens of pastors. These pastors love their churches and the members. They are really committed to their callings.

But they are real people who can really be hurt.

The pastors I spoke with this past week shared with me seven common themes of the things that hurt them the most. So, if you really want to hurt your pastor, follow these guidelines carefully.

1. Criticize the pastor’s family. Few things are as painful to pastors as criticizing their families, especially if the criticisms are related to issues in the church.
2. Tell the pastor he is overpaid. Very few pastors really make much money. But there are a number of church members who would like to make the pastor feel badly about his pay.
3. Don’t defend the pastor. Critics can be hurtful. But even more hurtful are those who remain silent while their pastor is verbally attacked. Silence is not golden in this case.   Continue at Thom S. Rainer

Pastors Aren’t Born But Formed

Cruising through Bruce Gordon's masterful biography on Calvin, I've been struck to see that pastors aren't born but formed. It's easy when reading the final edition of the Institutes or the later commentaries, at such a historical remove, to forget the development and the formative influences involved in turning the proud young legal scholar into a mature churchman and theologian.

As a young pastor myself, one theme that caught my attention was the formative influence of mentors and friends. In what follows I'd like to highlight three lessons on mentorship for both younger and older pastors drawn from Calvin's early years.

Choose Your Mentors Wisely 

First, choose your mentors wisely, with an eye to their weaknesses and strengths. Early on Calvin came under the mentorship of the fiery reformer William Farel. Farel was a strong voice for reform with solid theological credentials and a gospel heart, but he was overaggressive, and, at times, downright rowdy. In fact, Farel initially drafted the young Calvin into the work of reform in Geneva by threatening him with divine judgment on his studies and life if he refused to stay and help.   Continue at Derek Rishmawy

Nine Heartfelt Things Church Members Would Like to Say to Their Pastors

I am among the most blessed men in the world. God has graciously saved me and sustained me. I have an incredible family. The place and ministry where I serve vocationally is a gift from God.

And then, as if I should be blessed even more, God has allowed me to serve and hear from church leaders across the world. In this article, I share some insights I heard from church members via social media, emails, blog comments, and personal conversations.

The following nine statements are heart matters for many church members. For the most part, these members are not the perpetual critics and the business meeting naysayers. These are men and women who truly love their pastors. But many of them do have some words from the heart they would like to share with their pastors. But many are reticent to do so, because they know their pastors often receive criticisms and inordinate demands for attention.  Continue at Thom Rainer

7 Questions for Discouraged Pastors to Ask Themselves

For months now, I have been occasionally blogging through Encouragement for Today’s Pastors: Help from the Puritans. In one of the closing chapters, Joel Beeke and Terry Slachter remind their fellow pastors of the reward of grace. “The hope of glory (Rom 5:2) and the promise of a reward for our toil is the final catalyst for encouraging us as pastors.”

Reflecting on this ministerial grace several rewards are mentioned, including spiritual children God gives through conversions that occur under our ministry, as well as spiritual legacies that are left behind because of God’s gracious and sovereign revival of dying churches.    Continue at Paul Tautges

A Watchman on the Walls

It is not the work of the pastor to say whatever seems relevant or whatever seems noncontroversial or whatever is especially interesting to itching ears. Our responsibility, before God and for the sake of God’s people, is to declare the whole counsel of God (Acts 10:27).

The teachers of the church must disclose all of the glorious parts in Scripture and all the hard parts, all the promises and all the warnings, all the blessings and all the curses, all the parts that make us smile and all the parts that make us wince.

While we do not like to upset people and we do not wish to be thought uncouth, we answer to a higher authority. It is the solemn task of the preacher–weak and failing though he may be–to stand fast as a watchman on the walls. We cannot shrink back from the uncomfortable bits in the Bible (Acts 20: 20-21, 25-32). If we see the sword coming upon the land and refuse to blow the trumpet, the blood of the perishing will be upon our hands (Ezekiel 33:1-6).  Continue at Kevin De Young

Who Should Pick the Music?

“I just want to know who’s in charge?” That sentence brought light to my situation. I had just preached my candidating sermon, and was about to grab a brief lunch before Q&A with the congregation. But instead of eating, the chairman of elders and the interim executive pastor whisked me to a back room for a hastily convened meeting with the pastor of worship. He didn’t beat around the bush but got right to the point:

If I was called as lead pastor, who would decide what happened in the Sunday morning service prior to the sermon? Who would pick the music? Who would determine the order? Who, in short, would be in charge?  Continue at Michael Lawrence

10 Pastors I’m Concerned About

It’s not a secret the church has been in decline for a number of years and for a variety of reasons. You can read some statistics and views on why, here and here and here. Everyone has their opinions.

Abuse, apostasy, and irrelevance are just a few of the words that keep coming up in the search for reasons for the decline. There are a variety of compelling opinions and I even have a few of my own.

But I suggest there is another area of decline more significant and perhaps much less obvious—and one that certainly contributes to the church’s decline in numbers.

And I think its likely a careful analysis would implicate the church’s leadership for this more significant issue.

In other words, I’m concerned about pastors and the role they play in the church’s decline.

By saying so, I’m not suggesting this pastor has it all together. Nor am I trying to cultivate (or ratify) some dishonest skeptics’ hate for the church. Rather, I’m hoping to raise some concerns in a conversational kind of way.   Continue at  Peter Cockrell

Ten Fears of Church Leaders

I have not hidden my love for pastors and other church leaders. And I have said and written on many occasions that these church leaders often have a very difficult work. In fact, I recently told a large gathering of seminary students to consider very seriously their calling. No one should enter the ministry unless the calling is clear and secure.

As I converse and hear from church leaders across the country and beyond, I often hear of their challenges and fears. We all know that God has commanded us not to fear but, in our humanity and sinfulness, we do lapse into fear. I certainly did as a pastor, and I still succumb to that sin today.

So what are the most common fears of church leaders today? Here are ten I hear often, listed in my perceived order of frequency.

1. Fear of critics. Leading a church means the leader will have critics. Sometimes the criticisms become so frequent that it seems easier not to lead. For pastors and other church leaders, the steady inflow of negative comments becomes emotionally, spiritually, and physically draining.   Continue at Thom Rainer

Caring Enough to Wonder if What Just Happened, Happened

Mark Driscoll’s recent apology has provided for some thoughtful and edifying discussion.

And as we discuss, it’s best for us to remember a few things: We need to love and pray for him. We need to remember that we’re not omniscient. And we need to hope for the best and pray accordingly.

And in doing so, the church as the opportunity to grow from this. Questions are being raised. Ideas are being circulated. But there have been too many erroneous assertions and objections in the mix.

Here are a few categorically unhelpful ideas buzzing throughout evangelicalism regarding the Driscoll apology:

1. “Concern for the genuineness of one’s repentance is equivalent to a refusal to forgive.”

Continue at Eric Davis

9 Thoughts on Celebrity Pastors, Controversy, the New Calvinism

1. The term “celebrity pastor” is decidedly pejorative. I don’t know anyone who would be happy to own the phrase. That doesn’t mean we can’t use it. But it means we should not attach it to pastors in a knee jerk way. A Christian with some combination of influence, social media followers, books, a large church, and speaking engagements may be a public Christian or a well known individual, but let’s not use “celebrity pastor” unless we mean to say he relishes the spotlight, has schemed his way into the spotlight, and carries himself as being above mere mortals. Does this fit some popular preachers? Probably. Does it fit all of them? By no means.

2. Having said that, let us beware of the many devilish dangers that can beset us in this internet age. Have there always been Christians mired in controversy? Have there always been popular preachers? Have there always been charlatans in the church? Yes, yes, and yes. These things are not new. What is new is the myriad of ways we can channel our pride, feed our pride, and keep numerical count of our pride. I don’t think I’ve read a negative post on celebrity pastors or the evangelical industrial complex that doesn’t touch on legitimate issues and very real dangers. This is not a throwaway point. We need warnings. I need them too.   Continue at Kevin De Young

See also: For What it's Worth

John Wesley’s Failed Marriage

John Wesley (1703–1791) is best known in church history as the founder of Methodism. His commitment to the biblical gospel, passion for evangelistic preaching, and skill at organizing the budding Methodist movement are all notable traits. And God used those qualities to help spark the Evangelical Revival in England in the mid-18th century (a revival that paralleled the Great Awakening in North America). In that respect, there are many helpful things that we can learn from Wesley’s example.

His marriage, however, left a different kind of legacy; one which is also noteworthy, but not for good reasons.

As Methodist author John Singleton explains:

The saga of John Wesley’s marriage is a cautionary tale from the roots of Methodism that ought to resonate today with any couple so involved in church life that they fail to leave enough space for each other.    Continue at Nathan Busenitz


See also:  Interacting with Wesley’s Christian Perfection

Young Minister Describes Journey in and out of Calvinism

TEMPLE—Austin Fischer became a Calvinist because his reading of the Bible offered him no other choice. He left Calvinism when he could not reconcile its tenets with the self-sacrificial love God demonstrated on the cross of Jesus Christ.

Fischer, teaching pastor at Vista Community Church, a Baptist General Convention of Texas-affiliated congregation in Temple, wrote about his spiritual journey in Young, Restless, No Longer Reformed: Black Holes, Love and a Journey in and out of Calvinism. He is a graduate of the University of Mary Hardin-Baylor and Baylor University’s Truett Theological Seminary.

Like many young evangelicals, the writing of John Piper provided Fischer’s introduction to Calvinism—a system of theology inspired by Reformer John Calvin that emphasizes the sovereignty of God, the depravity of humanity and the predestined election of some to salvation and others to damnation.

As a teenager, Fischer lost interest in the “narcissistic” and shallow idea that Christianity existed just to provide him security and make him feel good, he said. So, his youth minister at Denman Avenue Baptist Church in Lufkin suggested he read Piper’s book, Desiring God.   Continue at Ken Camp

Mark Driscoll’s Problems, and Ours

The recent revelation that Mars Hill Church in Seattle paid an outside company to boost sales of its pastor’s books has raised questions not simply about personal integrity but also about the very culture of American Evangelicalism.

As an English Presbyterian living in the States, I am never quite sure about whether I am an “Evangelical” by American standards. Back home, I am Evangelical without question, but here it is more complicated. I certainly hold to a traditional, orthodox Protestant faith with a strong existential twist. But American Evangelicalism is more (and sometimes much less) than that. The political commitments of the movement are, on the whole, a mystery to me. And, while the celebrity leadership of the movement is comprehensible to me in sociological terms, I find it distasteful and arguably unbiblical. It too often seems to represent exactly what Paul was criticizing in 1 Corinthians 1.   Continue at Carl Trueman

7 Ways The Lord Uses Depression in the Life of a Minister

The Minister’s Fainting Fits, has proven to be one of the most personally helpful chapters in Spurgeon’s Lectures to My Students. There he writes:

Knowing by most painful experience what deep depression of spirit means, being visited therewith at seasons by no means few or far between, I thought it might be consolatory to some of my brethren if I gave my thoughts thereon…It is not necessary by quotations from the biographies of eminent ministers to prove that seasons of fearful prostration have fallen to the lot of most, if not all of them.

I am one of those ministers that battles seasons of deep depression. (I’ve chronicled my struggle elsewhere). These “fits of melancholy” can be quite confusing to the pastor. In the midst of darkness we are pressed to wonder how in the world we will deliver a sermon on Sunday morning, counsel the struggling, and lead the faithful. I’ve said with John Piper, “Have mercy on me. I must preach on Sunday, and I can scarcely lift my head.”    Continue at Mike Leake

Eight Ways to Spot Emotionally Healthy Pastors and Staff

William Vanderbloemen is the president and CEO of Vanderbloemen Search Group, an organization that has helped hundreds of churches and Christian organizations find the right person for the right position at the right time. The organization views emotional health as a key factor in assessing candidates. William recently shared how the firm looks for such candidates.

 

I found his “eight ways” to be incredibly insightful and helpful, so I am sharing his words mostly verbatim in this post.

1. Does the person constantly compare himself or herself to others?

Theodore Roosevelt is attributed to saying, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” Emotionally unhealthy people compare themselves to others, think the grass is always greener, and even resent others’ success. In contrast, emotionally healthy people are content with what God has given them, confident that God has perfectly equipped them for what He has called them to do, and can celebrate the success of others.

2. Does the person have a victim mentality?    Continue at Thom Rainer