How Far is Too Far? (Part 2)

Earlier this week, Gerald Hiestand expressed the need for pastors and ministry leaders to develop a more thought-out premarital sexual ethic. Research shows that only 20% of Christians remain abstinent prior to marriage. As evangelicals, we are often ready to take a necessary stand on homosexual ethics, yet the issue of heterosexual purity is compromised for nearly 80% of us. And so we want to begin a conversation that may feel offensive, overly conservative, or at a minimum, uncomfortable. Nonetheless, we think it’s an important one to have. We encourage you to begin by reading Gerald’s post and How Far is Too Far Part 1 for an introduction to this series of posts.

WHAT CONSTITUTES SEXUAL RELATIONS?

How far is too far? Perhaps this is the wrong question, but it’s one that is asked nonetheless. Gerald Hiestand and Jay Thomas give a thought provoking answer in Sex, Dating, and Relationships. What does it mean to adhere to the New Testament’s vision of sexual purity?

Nearly all Christians who take the Bible seriously will acknowledge that sexual activity should be reserved for marriage. And it’s doubtful that anyone—Christian or not—would really try to make a case that oral sex and fondling are not sexual activities. So the line is pretty clear as far as those activities are concerned. But what about kissing? Many (perhaps most) Christian dating couples regularly engage in passionate kissing.

Answering the kissing question is not as difficult as one might think. Clearly some forms of kissing are nonsexual; we kiss our children and our mothers. But there are some forms of kissing that we reserve exclusively for our wives. And the reason we do so is precisely that those forms of kissing are sexual.  Continue at Crossway