Pastors, your position is a demanding one, and those demands bring
unique struggles on your family. A pastor's wife bears a great burden,
but she usually enters into the ministry willingly. A pastor's children,
though, are carried on the current of their parents' calling. It is
often a life of singular struggle and uncommon needs. These struggles
often stem from the failures of the father. This isn't to cast full
blame on pastors for their children's problems. But it is to say that
pastors need to work to be good dads.
My own father has worked hard at this. He had his blind spots and
weaknesses, and they have been a source of tension between him and me.
But to this day, in his 33rd and last year of pastoral ministry, he has
never stopped trying to be a better father. As I wrote this I thought of
his failures, yes, but I also thought of successes. Lots of them. I
also thought of dozens of conversations with fellow PKs about such
struggles and their own relationships with their fathers. So know that
my writing does not stem from bitterness of heart or some jaded desire
to expose a good man's faults. I love my dad. My desire is to see
struggles avoided or defeated for other pastors and PKs.
So here are seven of the most significant ways a pastor can be a good father to his children. Pastors, your child needs . . .
1. A dad, not a pastor
Yes, you are called to pastor your family, but PKs want a
dad---someone who plays with them, protects them, makes them laugh,
loves their mom, gives hugs, pays attention, teaches them how to build a
budget and change the oil and field a ground ball. We want committed
love and warmth. We want a dad who's not a workaholic. Continue at Barnabas Piper
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