Editors' Note: This is part three in a series on pastor's wives. Previously:
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An article in our local newspaper announced an airline's new
policy---"your fourth wife flies free"---in honor of a ruler who had
just taken his fourth wife.
When my husband traveled to India for ministry he brought back an
interesting anecdote. He said, "Every pastor I met introduced himself to
me like this: 'My name is So-and-so; I have one wife and however-many
kids.'" One of our church members from India explained that the rules of
English grammar might be the reason the Indian pastors said that they
have "one" wife instead of "a" wife.
Even so, in this area of the world, monogamous marriages are not
assumed. I suppose it couldn't hurt for married pastors to affirm that
they are married to only one wife!
Besides the "only one wife if you're married" clause, 1 Timothy 3 and
Titus 1 list nearly 20 requirements for a potential under-shepherd of
the Lord's sheep.
But where is the list of qualifications to be an elder's wife?
Scripture-based ecclesiology offers no explicit job description for the
office of pastor's wife, because there is no such office.
Empty Nesters to Nursing Moms
There is no office for the elder/pastor's wife, yet many wives feel
pressure (or even a desire) to function as an honorary elder or unpaid
staff member of the church. Direction in ministry for a pastor's wife
can take on many forms, but one specific ministry ought to be valued
over every other service opportunity she may be gifted to do or feel
passionately about---that is, a wife's ministry to her husband and
family.
To state it negatively, a pastor's wife's ministry to her husband and
family should not be regarded as nominal and diminishing in comparison
to other opportunities to serve in the church. Continue at Gloria Furman
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